I love my friends...

We went out for E's birthday last weekend and had a hell of a time.   Two things happened that day - 1. I baked. 2. I put on close-toed shoes for the first time of the season.   So what?   They are related but let me get there.   So, after a long evening of many beverages, we decide a change of scenery is necessary.   At this point, my feet hurt so bad that I contemplated going home so I didn't have to walk any farther.   Instead, I did what any classy broad would do and walked around barefoot.   So, R decides to be the gentleman he can be and carries my baked items while I carry my shoes.   At this point, he is running through a laundry list of the things that can happen to me while walking around barefoot.   [Insert lack of caring here.]  To the escalator we come and I seriously think R is going to full on panic that I am really not going to brave the pain of my shoes for the safety of my feet on said escalator.   So, he escalates (get it?) the things that could happen to me whilst standing on such public disease.   At this point, he is trying to convince me that I am going to get lock jaw.   To which, myself and another dude laugh hysterically.   I look at said dude and said - glad someone else is hearing this.   And then he speaks.   Australian accent - melt my heart.   I make him speak some more.   Swoon.   It is at this point that I decide the Aussie must taste my cake so I shoved a giant piece in his mouth.   R is still holding the cake and is happy to have his mind of my feet.   Anyway, we bid the Aussie adieu and carry on to the next bar.  

As R and I are arguing about my putting my shoes back on to enter the bar, I finally concede.    We order drinks and find the rest of the group.   Two minutes later, the Aussie approaches our table.  WEIRD.   We left the original bar and went very far way and to a totally different type of place.  In other words, it would not have been a natural progression for most anyone but us.    So, to see him there was totally bizarre and as far as I could tell he couldn't have followed us mostly because he was long gone by the time we decided on destination number 2.    Long story short, he sits with us and I talk to him forever.   To say he was intriguing would be a giant understatement.   From what I remember, he was really fun to talk to and I promise it was not just the accent.    Anyway, why I love my friends mostly had to due with the plethora of texts I had the next day:

A - Do you have a shrimp on your barbie? 
E - How did it go with Aussie, Aussie, Aussie?  Oy oy oy. 
J - Did you go down under?
R- Please tell me you didn't bag an Aussie.  

And there were many, many more.   For the record, nothing happened with him mostly because the accent was the only thing I was physically attracted to.    After all, I was POSITIVE he was gay until very long into the evening.   Apparently, I also decided to mention that to him and he was so confused.   I lost all ability to filter at that point and quickly pointed out that he was wearing a vest and a pageboy hat.   No doy?   Yeah, he wasn't, in fact, gay and then told me loved me.   Don't worry - he doesn't - I haven't heard from him since mostly because there was no exchange of digits.  

The whole incident was worth it just for the quality text messages later.   And no, I did not contract lock jaw.   I love my friends - I didn't stop laughing for hours.